Hey LD, I need some relationship advice and I hope you can help me. I love my girlfriend with all my heart and I have always given her my all. But I don’t understand why she keeps hurting my feelings! She insults me a lot and even when I give her my best, but she tells me my efforts don’t mean anything and that I am useless. Sometimes, she makes me jealous of all these guys flirting with her and all I can do is swallow my pride.
My friends say that I am not the same person that I was. She told me that she loves me, but why is she treating me this way? I feel so insecure, I lost my confidence in myself and I am so lost! I don’t know what to do. Why? Why is she doing this to me? –dazed and confused
Hey Dazed and confused,
Thanks for writing! I am so sorry to hear about your current situation. It seems like your girlfriend is not showing you respect and your relationship is unhealthy. It’s not that it’s right, but you allowed her to treat you that way. By setting yourself aside just to please her, it sends a message that you don’t value, respect or love yourself. If that’s the case, why should she?
What you allow is what will continue. Have you tried asking her why she’s always insulting you or hurting your feelings? Maybe there is something missing in your relationship that you both need to address.
If you say that you’ve given her your all and she still thinks it’s not enough or it’s useless plus she’s making you feel inadequate – you are in the wrong relationship. A healthy relationship should make you feel good about yourself and make you feel like you are loved instead of making you wonder WHY? Does she love me?
What I can suggest is you need to put more importance to yourself. Learn to identify what doesn’t help you grow or make you happy anymore. Remember, people only treat you one way.. The way you allow them. Know your worth, respect and love yourself more. Once you genuinely care about yourself, you will attract the people that are right for you.
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